| Jul. 27th, 2009 @ 10:55 pm Unsent Letter. |
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I try to talk to you
Can't get past the weather
The friend I thought I knew
Has found somethin', somewhere better
So I'm hanging on your line
Thought we could speak together
Tell me what it is with you, you seem gone forever
I'm spendin' all my time driven round thinkin' clever
With a girl who seems all right and another one who's better
I don't know if I lied when I said we're not together
But I try to talk to you, some how you seem gone
I know what could've been. Try not to think about it
Found it hard to live wi' this, and long to live without it
But my dreams have caught me out, I found my self surrounded
By the odds of our own end enough said about it
I'm spendin' all my time driven round thinkin' clever
With a girl who seems all right and another one who's better
I don't know if I lied when I said we're not together
But I try to talk to you, some how you seem gone
I've given up some thing, I guess that doesn't matter
I've started other things, I guess that doesn't matter
But I finally wrote your song, another unsent letter
In a pile addressed to you, c-/ of somethin', somewhere better
I'm spendin·all my time driven round thinkin·clever
With a girl who seems all right and another one who's better
I don't know if I lied when I said we're not together
But I try to talk to you, some how you seem gone
I'm spendin·all my time driving round fakin' clever
With a girl who seems all right and another one who's better
I don't know if I lied when I said that I'm together
But I try to talk to you, some how you seem gone forever
Yeah, but I try to talk to you, some how you seem gone forever
Yeah, but I try to talk to you, some how you seem gone forever
Yeah, but I try to talk to you, some how you seem gone
Sometimes i do childish, immature things. Like, sometimes i'll pick up my guitar and play along with some songs, close my eyes and imagine that i'm up on stage and these are my songs that im sharing with the world. Or maybe when i'm outside having a cigarette, i might talk quietly to myself and do a monologue from a scene in a movie. I fantasize alot i suppose. An old old friend/girl of mine once said i was a dreamer. Yeah that's me, sitting with my head in the clouds, day dreaming my life away. I read a bit too much into things like movies/lyrics whatever. I act like i don't care about much, but in truth, i care plenty. God, i want to get high, not heroin, just smoke some weed or something. I wish i could play in front of people like i play by myself. I dunno, when i play/sing in front of people, i get all self concious and purposely fuck up. I have no idea why i do that.
I heard a theory about Garfield the other day. The theory goes like this: Garfield is NOT a fat. spoilt cat. No, in fact he is a starving, homeless stray who has been abused by humans and beat up by dogs at every corner. Reasoning? Well, lets start with Jon and Odie, Garfield owns those bitches. Garfield always gets his own way and walks all over Odie and Jon, the fact that he has been severly abused/mistreated and is starving/homeless, his psyche has fractured and created this world, where he is well fed, fat, warm and rules the proverbial roost. It's a fantasy much like the theory that Ed, Edd and Eddy are children in purgatory. Besides, whatever happened to Lyman? he hasn't appeared since 1983... he just UP AND LEFT WITH NO EXPLANATION. It's because he was a potential threat to garfields sub-concious. Which reminds me, Calvin and Hobbes is probably my favourite comic of all time. What to say about that.
I feel so hollow inside, i lost my soul somewhere along the way. I don't even know why i write in this journal, i can't stand the majority of people. Hell, my buddy Andy (Drik) lives in Michigan and we're a couple of cats when we get low, which is alot i suppose. Both of us are ex druggies who are emotional retards and basically all around fuck ups. He lives in the ghettos, like the only white guy in the neighbourhood. We play WoW all day, we're both pretty much the best you can get too, on any class (he sucks as druid tho, heh, thats okay, im pro at resto druid). It was him tho, that got me off heroin again. He didn't give me any bullshit, he just told it to me from his point of view and it was raw and honest. It wasn't bullshit. Takes one to know one. I dunno why i dont go to the sly fox these days. It bores me i suppose, i don't really have fun. The music sucks, the people are pretty fake, but thats Australia for ya. Fuck it, i want to move to Norway or Prague or somewhere in Europe. Somewhere where i don't speak the language so i cant hear peoples crap i suppose. I'd love to travel and meet people, but i dont want to go alone i suppose. Last time i went on a holiday i ended up smashing up the hotel room and slashing my wrists. Incidently the bill came to $730 (i smashed up some windows and a painting and got blood all over the floor. Oh and the lock had to be replaced since the police kicked in the door).
where are all these pretty girls man...
God, my dress sense is horrible i've discovered, it's not the 80's anymore :( leather jackets, long hair, all that garbage just isnt hip, in fact i probably look retarded. I'd go buy new clothes but man, i have no idea what to buy. I'd be so lost, lol. I care way too much what other people think of me.
Oh, apparently i have some brain damage, neat huh?
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